Your Ex Is Threatening to Share Private Photos: What to Do First
Reviewed by Jacob Reed, founder of Verity ·
Short answer
Don't pay, don't send more images, and don't delete the threats. Save the messages that threaten you, with their dates, then use a free tool that helps stop the images being posted on participating platforms: StopNCII.org if you were 18 or older when they were taken, or Take It Down from the National Center for Missing & Exploited Children if you were under 18. If something is posted, the FTC says platforms must take it down within 48 hours of your request. Report the threats to the police, and call the CCRI Image Abuse Helpline, 844-878-2274, for support.
This is frightening, and it is not your fault. There are people and tools for exactly this.
Right now
- If you are in danger, call 911.
- Don't pay, send more images, or agree to anything to make the threats stop.
- Don't reply with threats of your own. One line, or none at all, is enough.
- Tell someone you trust, and call the CCRI Image Abuse Helpline at 844-878-2274.
Keep the threats, not the images
- Save every threatening message as it is, in the full conversation, with the dates and the sender's number or account.
- Note any demand that came with it: money, getting back together, dropping a case.
- If the images were taken when you were under 18, don't copy, forward or send them to anyone, even as evidence. Use Take It Down and NCMEC's CyberTipline, and tell the police.
Stopping the images from spreading
- StopNCII.org, for images taken when you were 18 or older: it makes a hash, a digital fingerprint, of each image and shares only that hash with participating companies, so they can detect and remove the images.
- Take It Down, from NCMEC, for images taken when you were under 18: you can stay anonymous and don't have to send the images to anyone. It works on public or unencrypted platforms that take part.
- If something is posted: the FTC says platforms must give you an easy way to ask for a takedown and must remove the image within 48 hours; if one doesn't, you can report it at TakeItDown.ftc.gov.
In a custody or protective order case
A threat to share intimate images is the kind of message to put in front of your lawyer straight away, and it can support a protective order; see text evidence for a protective order and showing messages to the police. Verity reads your export in your browser, without uploading it, numbers every message in date order and flags threats, including wording such as "I'll post your pictures" and "I'll expose you", each with its date and the messages around it. It reads text only, never images.
Pages cited
Read on November 3, 2026. Check each organization's page for the latest details.
- Cyber Civil Rights Initiative (CCRI): Image Abuse Helpline
- StopNCII.org: who it is for and how it works
- Take It Down (National Center for Missing & Exploited Children)
- Did an online platform fail to quickly take down your intimate images? (FTC)
This is general information, not legal advice. In an emergency, call 911. CCRI Image Abuse Helpline: 844-878-2274. National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233, or text START to 88788.
Keep the threats in order
Drop in your export and read every message numbered in date order. It is read in your browser and is not uploaded.